Your Wedding is a Ritual; It's not a performance

This is something I say to brides, grooms, and everyone else involved in the wedding day. It's just too easy to get caught up in the performance aspect of it. There's the dress, makeup, camera, video, music....it can really start to feel like a performance. I have actually had numerous people call the start of the ceremony, "show time". Next thing you know, the day is over and you can't remember a thing. So here are some suggestions of ways that I help couples remain present on their wedding day:

As you begin your day, remember that this is a day to declare to your community of family and friends that you choose each other and they are there to celebrate with you. It's not a contest to judge the cake, the dress or the first dance. It's a day to enjoy each other and share in your love. It is an honor to be invited to a wedding and each person there loves you and cares about you.

Here is an interesting thing I have noticed over and over again. When I meet with couples the first time, they will give me an estimated number of guests, including "the ones that definitely won't come". When I meet with them again, a month or so before the wedding, they will tell me many of those people who "definitely won't come" are coming. Why? Because it is an honor to be invited to a wedding and EVERYONE wants to come!!

Take time throughout the day, with your partner, your family and friends and with yourself to pause and acknowledge the things about your wedding day that are sacred and dear to you.

During the ceremony, look into one another's eyes and hearts to really connect authentically with your whole heart.

At some point during the ceremony take a moment to look out at your family and friends and let in how much they love you and care about you and how wonderful it is that they are present to support you in your marriage.


Let yourself remember that this day will never happen again. As each moment passes, that moment will never happen again... Remember to breathe. Enjoy!

Diana Morgan, M.A., H.H.E., Minister
PO Box 553, Santa Rosa, CA 95402
707-548-7003 or 925-980-9052
dianaconcoffmorgan@gmail.com

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